Remembering

Kathie's mother passed away peacefully on April 18, 2013. Though life has been good and fulfilling for her these last several years, struggling with various aches and pains had made her ready for this end. Whenever someone passes, I find myself looking through pictures and remembering. So, I thought I'd share a few of those memories here.

In 1989, after each of us had been alone for awhile, Kathie and I connected, fell in love and chose to spend the rest of our lives together. Here we are on the day of our marriage with her parents, Stan and Jane–Dad and Mom, and with sister Gail and her family as well as my new stepchildren, Travis and Jessica. They all, but especially Mom and Dad, welcomed me warmly into the family, beard and all. I learned much later, that Dad had at one time purchased an electric shaver to give me as a joke, but then never could follow through to give it to me. Years later, when the four of us took a Caribbean cruise together, I shaved the beard one morning on a whim. I recall Mom touching my bare cheeks with her hands and saying how nice she thought I looked.

In 2007, several years after Dad passed, we moved Mom back to Iowa from their home in Florida, where they had spent most of their 20 or so retirement years. We staged this picture to share with her friends back in Florida, telling them that we now expected her to keep our walks shoveled for us.

Being in Iowa permitted all of us to be together more often. So, for example, Mom was able to attend a party in honor of David and Vicki's high school graduation, as well as Kris's graduation from her dental technician's program.

Taken at our lake home, this is a four generation picture of Mom with Kathie, grandchildren Jessica and Travis, and great granddaughter Maia.

Her extended family added each of Will, Rob, and Betsy's families. Here we all are some years ago, prior to the additions of Penny and Frederick. Mom loved to needlepoint and made several Christmas stockings for these adopted great grandchildren.

A few days prior to Jessica and Mike's wedding, we hosted a party at our home, and Mom brought along her own wedding dress to model for us. She had been a young war bride as Dad went off to serve as a medic in the army in the European campaign.

When we went for various drives together, such as back and forth to the lake home, Mom would repeatedly comment about how long all the semi trucks were and how there were so few barns anymore. These running commentaries became funny to Kathie and me, so one Mother's Day, I took the two ladies for a brunch and a drive in the country on a beautiful, sunny, Sunday morning. We ended up, not without some planning, at a historic round barn near us, and I took a picture there as well.

If you know anything about Kathie's family, you know that they love to play games, especially cards, most especially a game called Hand and Foot. So, here is one of those many, many, too-numerous-to-count occasions when such a game was underway. She was always a shrewd player!

Mom used to tease me about all the baseball games I watched on TV (or football, for that matter), and she would often tell me that the rules were all wrong. For example, she thought pitchers should throw the ball so that hitters could have plenty of chances to hit the ball. In spite of trying to explain the game, she insisted more hitting would be better. So, one Christmas, I bought her a couple rule books as a joke and put them in her Christmas stocking. I doubt she was reading this book with any serious interest, but it was fun to see her laugh at receiving it.

She loved to spend summer months at the lake with us. Although she sometimes took a boat ride with us, more often she would wait for our return and "ask" about the size of our catch of fish with hand gestures like this.

After we added the hot tub, she seemed to enjoy spending time in it with Kathie, even being known to skinny dip with Kathie a time or two while I found a reason to be elsewhere.

Finally, it is impossible not to think of Mom and our dogs. She loved dogs more than anyone I ever met  and simply could not resist giving them treats or table scraps. Here she is with Tighe. I can't seem to find one of her with Josey, who she definitely loved best. She and Josey were like old souls together.

I have been fortunate to be included and to be loved by my in-laws, especially Mom and Dad. Having lost my own mother so very many years ago (34 now), it has been nice to have a surrogate all this time. Be at peace, Mom!